Taking out “but” in Negotiations.

The word “but” is never a word people want to see in negotiations.  “But” is a barrier to anyone’s  success in a negotiation proceeding.   The use of this word tends to focus on the party’s position not their interests.  Positions, while valuable to understand, are never going to lead to solutions.  Instead of using the word “but”, the parties should think about why they feel a certain way.  Looking at the interests that make up their position, the parties will be better equipped to negotiate terms to a deal that will address those interests specifically.  By doing this, the parties maximize the benefits of the negotiation proceedings. 

            Additionally, the word “but” tends to be a conversation killer.  When people use the word “but” to explain their position, the other party is put off guard and no longer wants to discuss the issue.  It is because of this that the word “but” is so destructive in negotiation discussions.  It tends to destroy the other party’s interest in pursuing the negotiation.  The word “but” is synonymous with words like “however”, “nevertheless”, and “yet.”  They signify an objection to something without explaining why the objection is being lodged.  As discussed above, this tends to distract the parties from each other’s interests and serves as a road block to the parties addressing and coming to a finalization of a deal that encompasses the interests of the parties. 

            When parties focus more on their interests than their positions and explain why they want the things they want, the parties will gain mutual understanding and will be equipped to resolve the dispute in a manner that benefits all of the parties.